US of Anderson

Today is a blessed day. Not only are David “Dave” and Nikolai visiting Camp Silver, America’s #1 camp for sexually active Christian children, but David “Dave” is also launching a new website:www.SaveCampSilver.com.

It’s a perfect storm of Christianity, sexuality, and the World Wide Web.

Watch as Dave and Nikolai journey to the North Woods of Wisconsin for a private tour of Camp Silver from camp owner—and David “Dave’s” Granddad—Bertil Anderson. Although earlier this year Camp Silver was shuttered indefinitely by Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker (it’s rumored that the evangelical governor didn’t like the camp’s inclusion of children of all faiths, creeds, and sexualities), this episode offers a rare glimpse of the sacred grounds of America’s favorite Christian Camp. There’s even a recording of the infamous Camp Silver theme song, “Sacred Place.” Download it here for free.

After watching this episode, visit www.SaveCampSilver.com, David “Dave’s” latest passion project. A cutting-edge website,SaveCampSilver.com takes on the ugly prejudice facing this beloved Christian camp by highlighting Camp Silver’s rich history and tradition. There’s even a cut of Camp Silver’s latest television ad. You just can’t keep a sexually active Christian child down.

Support this noble cause and order a T-Shirt from the website, make adonation to USofAnderson, or email David “Dave” and he just might cut you a deal on last year’s Camp Silver T-Shirts.

We shall overcome!

UsofAnderson.com has been quiet for several months. The silence ends today.

Season Three of this award-winning show starts NOW! And it’s gonna be nuts. During the next 11 weeks David “Dave” will elevate online storytelling, revealing he’s not your parents’ Garrison. He’s Keillor 2.0, taking his own brand of “Lake Wobegon” stories to the web. (NOTE: If you don’t know who Garrison Keillor is, that’s good. He’s just another sonorous, stodgy baby-boomer who talks about sexless Lutherans on NPR. David “Dave” is a spastic Generation Xer who doesn’t take his Ritalin.)

Over the next few months, new videos will be released every Monday. It’ll be as epic as Tobey McGuire and Dakota Fanning combined, a total Tobey Fanning tabbouleh.

First stop on this riot-o-fun is America’s most formidable fortress: The Mitchell, South Dakota Corn Palace.

Listed in most reputable guidebooks as the 8th Wonder of the World, the Corn Palace delights man and child alike with peerless mosaic corn art. Watch as David “Dave” dances with Cornelius, the Palace mascot, discuses the use of negative space in corn art, and croons his original song, “Hey Teosinte,” performed by John Elliott. Download it here for free!

No road trip is truly about the destination, unless of course it’s a very long funeral procession. In Slides, Saddlebags & Gospel Poets, Nikolai and I share with you the very whimsy that can be enjoyed while cruising across America’s rich landscape in a Nissan Sentra with an illegal distributor cap. Set to John Elliott and The Hereafter’s Anybody Everybody , this episode delights as Nikolai sails down an alpine slide, as I shop for affordable leather, and as Jim Bean, the traveling gospel poet, shares the word of the Lord in stanza form at a Chevron station.

Gazing at our four forefathers in stone, one might feel a swelling of American pride. I feel triumph.

Several years ago as a college student, I made a film at Mount Rushmore, about Mount Rushmore, staring Mount Rushmore.

Remember Rushmore (How to get to Galapagos from the Heartland) was to be my first opus.  Unfortunately, it drowned me in debt and left me eating rice and beans for several years as I hid out from over-bearing park rangers who were upset with my creative decisions. This all said, audiences loved the film. At my family reunion in Racine, Wisconsin in 2003, Aunt Trudy, who never has anything good to say about anyone, called it, “an American masterpiece of good shit.” At least that’s what we think she said. She was off her meds that day.

In this episode I screen this critically acclaimed film at the very place it was shot, Mount Rushomre… well not exactly. I shot it in Mount Rushmore National Park; I screen it in Mount Rushmore National Park Parking Ramp, Level 3.

Watch as Nikolai and I delight tourist after tourist with my cinematic masterpiece.

Also, don’t’ forget to visit the Remember Rushmore (How to get to Galapagos from the Heartland) website to view the trailer and order your very own DVD copy!

Welcome to God’s Granite, Mount Rushmore.

This episode brings you up close and personal with America’s finest stoned presidents: Washington, Jefferson, Roosevelt, Lincoln, and if I had my way, Ronnie.

Enjoy my signature Rushmore rap about how the Muslims have Mecca but we have molten rock. Watch me interact with a real-life park ranger and ask the tough questions no one’s got the guts to ask. And as the sunsets, hear me croon to young minds about trickle-down economics and how I love you, and you, and you, and you.

Yes, America gives good head at this National Park. No doubt about it.

People go on road trips for all sorts of reasons. I’m on this road trip for Nikolai. Nikolai is searching for something, something he can’t find in his homeland– a vision, an inspiration, a raison d’être.

There’s no doubt the landscape of America through a car window is quite invigorating and can stir something in man’s heart, even if it is the ticker of a socialistic Russki. Yet, I’d like to think that it’s my companionship along that will bring Nikolai out of his shell, show him that an existence is better when you have good bud, and remind him that life’s about a journey and not about fame, money, or even a lucrative six-picture video art deal.

That’s my hope for this road trip, at least.

I’ve set this video to John Elliott and The Hereafter’s track, Better Now. You’ll remember John’s talents from Episode 8 – John Mayer Concert. Check out more of his music here.

See you next week at Mount Rushmore… God’s granite.

Once again I’m handing over the editing system to Sir Nikolai so he can express his “deep” thoughts. In this episode, he’s taking on The Great Salt Lake, which he claims is very near and dear to his heart. Apparently as a young boy in Moscow during the Gorbachev years, he befriended a Mormon missionary by the name of Jack Scott.

Mormon Scott showed Nikolai photos of The Great Salt Lake, and the impressionable Russian fell in love with the body of water. I think it was the Mormon girls in their Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints issue underwear sunning themselves that caught the Russki’s eye, but he claims it was the majestic landscape.

Whatever the case, enjoy Master Nikolai’s pontifications on America’s land-locked salt lake that is both “holy” and “savage,” as he so “deeply” describes.

Oh, and check out the shorts he’s wearing. I picked them out for him. I think he looks great, and if some Mormon girls were ready and willing, he’d totally get at least two wives, maybe even three. Who could say no to those legs? No god-fearing girl, right?

After a man is baptized in the name of all religions, he needs some time to contemplate. And there’s no better place to allow the waters of baptism to seep into a man’s pores than along the sunny shores of The Great Salt Lake.

In this episode, watch as Nikolai and I discuss my recent baptism with East Coast tourists, search for a cross for Nikolai to bring back to his mother in Russia, and pray with a Floridian biker dude.

There’s more spirituality packed into this episode than in most church bulletins.

If you really enjoy it, think about donating a dollar to USofAnderson and help defray the cost of the series of antibiotics I had to take to rid myself of the rare bacteria I contracted from that blessed salt lake.

Amen!

There’s no question that God endowed me with a helluva musical ear. Therefore, nothing gives me more pleasure than to announce that in this episode I release my latest recording: Baptized like Joseph Smith.

It’s a ballad and a love song of sorts about my favorite topic: Sin. Yup, “I’ve been a sinner and the whole world knows,” as I artfully croon in this ditty. It’s the perfect song for this episode in which Nikolai and I head to the Great Salt Lake so I can conduct a baptism– my own– as well as use the healing powers of the Great Salt Lake to soothe my face which has been ravaged by the orange paint from my Orange Man Solo Group performance. NOTE TO SELF: Dutch Boy #B26 Orange does not come off without a bath in paint thinner.

Download the song for free here. Enjoy the episode. You’ve never before seen such a beautiful display of spirituality in a body of salt water.

Nikolai is always hassling me about how I don’t show enough of his perspective in our videos. Please, Russki, everything is not always about you!!! Nonetheless, to show what a statesman I am, I have agreed to let Nikolai edit his version of the Orange Man Solo Group performance. I’m quite curious to see what spin on the truth my Red Friend comes up with in this video.

Also, please don’t forget to visit the Orange Man Solo Group Website or purchase the latest in Orange Man apparel. You can also donate to the OMSG mission here. Free art is not easy to give to the world.